This One Is Very Family Newslettery-ish - Warning

We managed to get a family photo just before Writer Son and Sassy Bride moved to Texas. They are the cozy couple in the upper left, been married just over one year! I love both shots and feel like they truly portray who we are. 

Miss Tattoo Girl, Rocker Son's girlfriend now has black hair. I have a suspicion that if Tattoo Girl ever officially joins our family, it will be difficult to keep the photos up to date due to her constant hair changes! Ha! That is one of the things I love about her, very artistic! I sincerely hope that she will be making our family photos colorful for many years to come. (C'mon Rocker Son, don't do anything stupid ok?)

Hubs and I are missing our eldest and his wife but our hearts have been totally gratified to see and hear the good things that are happening for them since making the move. It was the right thing to do and they are happy and thriving with lots of people around them who love and appreciate who they are. What more could a mom want? (...well...to be in the same state when grandkids arrive!....but whatever!)

Oh I remember what I came to tell you! Writer Son has finally created his own blog! I am so excited that he is following the urge to write again as he used to years ago. His writing voice is exactly how he talks, very funny, self-depreciating and clever with words and cultural phrases. He plays with words in a way that people love and find engaging. You'll see when you go to his site cause I know you will, won't you? 

Warning...His passions are very nerdy; movies, comics, and God. Name any superhero and he knows its entire history, name a movie and he knows not only the director but which actors were considered before they chose the ones we see.  And, yes, name a book of the Bible or a question about God and he has good, deep and often funny thoughts and stories to tell.

Ok, enough of the bragging mom, go check his blog out....BUT do not give him this blog address in your comments ok?

This is my secret blog that they do not read!!

Otherwise how could I post family pics and talk about possible future daughter-in-laws, etc? 

Got it?

ok thanks! I am trusting you.

Writer Son's blog is called Last Action Arnold.  You will love it, especially my younger readers, well I love it and I'm not young, but I'm his mom so......the rambling has begun so this is a good place to say good-night I think.

Blessings,

Family

Writer Son and Sassy Bride were here last night. I think they surprised me with a visit because they knew that Hubs was working until midnight and I just might have sounded a bit lonely when I called them earlier in the day.

I had an interesting little "aha!" moment while they were here. I have plans for this Friday night, but when they mentioned they may come over on Friday to do their laundry I nodded happily and said it would be fine.

I suddenly understood my own mother's ease at putting aside her plans if the "kids" were coming over.

There is just something lovely about being around my sons and their ladies. There is nothing I would rather do and I know that Hubs feels the same way. For his birthday coming up, he just wants them all over here for a fun meal.

Years ago I would have chosen my work or my work friends over them. I would. But this year I have learned a great deal about the value of family. Family is there with you through the garbage and tough times.

My family knows me. They know that silly stuff and the painful stuff and they love me still. They ask the right questions. They see beyond the "I'm fine." answer.

Cherish your family members while you have them my friends.

Do Your Dishes Talk?

Have said it before but I am saying it again! I LOVE my empty nest. But it does get kind of quiet and boring every once in a while. ...I know that those of you who are currently chasing little munchkins around your house and yard are wanting to cuss at me after that statement.....Sorry, but your quiet, boring moments will come, they will.

As I was saying, it does happen around here, but not so often that I wish they'd move back home! Nope, that is not happening (knock on wood). But I really do love it when they come spend the evening or day with us. I never knew how fun it would be to be around my sons and their Loves as adults.

For a small peek at one of the best things about their visits, hop on over to my latest post at GoodBlogs, called I Think My Dishes Are Talking To Each Other and help vote it to the Top Posts for me won't you?

Thanks friends!,

Do You Have Old Kids?

I am trying to find the words to explain the pleasure I get from having my grown kids in my home. Even though my sons are 24 and 28, this is a new sensation for me. Twenty-four year old Rocker Son has only started coming around now that he has a new girlfriend and has cleaned up his life a bit. Writer Son is newly married and I think my enjoyment about his presence is that we are not always nagging at him about job, money, car etc. That's his wife's job now! Ha! Actually, being married has transformed him into a grown man taking on real responsibilities and that is totally a kick to watch!

I remember my mom talking a lot about how much she loved having us all home for visits. We could never stay long enough to please her. "Don't go home yet, spend the night!" I did not understand it. But I do now.

Well, I'm not sure that I really understand it, like I said at the beginning, I am having trouble putting my finger on why it brings me so much pleasure to have them around. After all, I am basking in the wonderfullness of the empty nest!

The empty nest is glorious for hubs and me! I have waxed rapturous about it way back here and several other posts as well. So what is it about sitting on the couch and watching my sons and their ladies laughing and jostling in the kitchen that warms my heart so much? Hubs and I will catch each others eyes and share a smile as we hear the loud laughter erupt, even if they are laughing at us. Which they definitely do. 

It may have something to do with watching them become grown-ups right before our eyes. Where did those messy, bumbling, noisy (well they are still noisy) little boys go? We can still see them very clearly in these handsome men that fill our kitchen up with their huge feet and tall bodies. 

Or it could be the joy in seeing them look at the girls they love! Oh my goodness! That is a truly amazing sensation to watch that happen! To listen to the cute, flirty banter and even the married bickering is funny to us.

I am so thankful that both my sons live close right now. I do not take it for granted, it could change in a moment. I intend to enjoy every minute I can while they live close enough to drop by if they happen to be passing by on their way to something else, or they want to watch a show we all love. 

And someday.....they will take a while to get in the house because they are busy unloading baby seats and grabbing the diaper bag! Someday, but for now they are more than enough!

Had A Great M Day!!I

I love gifts so much! This sat around ALL day without a mention, drove me craaazy!

Any moments with Rocker Son are a treasure to me. He is creative and hilarious!

I adore these people! My men and their ladies.

Hubs calls Writer Son his "Giant leprechaun" since sporting this beard. He is over 6 feet.

Sweet Sassy Bride made us some wonderful chicken tacos with homemade guacamole! Delish!

At last Writer Son handed me the gift bag! Wonderful scarf and a charm necklace that
 I cannot wait to wear!

I also love Rocker Son's, Tattoo Girlfriend, she is so funny and strong!

Amazing dessert of yogurt, fruit, sweet granola and honey! So good!

Not sure why Hubs took a pic of these guys, but we laughed a lot at them
on our fav show, The Amazing Race Finale!

Sassy Bride even insisted on cleaning my kitchen after all that hard work!

Hubs "helping" Sassy Bride at the stove.

Yay for a great Mother's Day 2011.

I hope yours was a good one too! 

Mediocre Mother's Day To You!

I just posted an unusual Mother's Day post on GoodBlogs, come read me and vote for me ok? Thank you my friends!

Gimmee, Gimmee

On your mark, get set, GO! Mother's Day weekend is just hours away and this year I have high hopes. I am the mother of two sons and a husband who loves to remind me that I am not his mother. Well, I don't WANT to be his mother but I DO want presents!

My sons are lovable, sweet and caring, but in the gift department, not so great. Oh, one year Writer Son presented me with an amazing box of chocolate covered strawberries though! That was amazing and delish! He got a lot of points that year.

But this year my hopes are high because both of my sons have lady-loves in their lives and that should make a difference right? Am I wrong in thinking that their ladies will remind them about Mother's Day? Don't dash my hopes now people.  Do your married sons give better gifts than they did before marriage?

My eyes are closed and my arms are held out, ready to receive the goodies on Mother's Day this Sunday.

Seinfeld and Sighs

Wedding Parents

I am sitting here on my big brown couch in front of an old Seinfeld re-run laughing at jokes that I have seen a hundred times over the years. It's been a very quiet rainy day at my house. Hubs and I are patting ourselves on the back for a successful family gathering here yesterday.

We had ten people here, a few of them meeting new family members for the first time. It was sweet and full of laughter as family stories were told like  familiar TV reruns. You know what the punchline is but you still crack up just as hard every time.

I am so thankful that my sons new in-laws are people that Hubs and I would have been friends with even if we met them in a different circumstance. How lucky can you get? Last night was the longest stretch of time we've spent with Sassy Bride's parents so far. They live in another state and our only contact has been Facebook and a few quick hugs at the wedding last October.

Last night they sat in my home and had good food, watch wedding pictures on the TV screen and shared funny recollections about their family and little miss Sassy Bride in particular.

Another new addition my parents were meeting for the first time was Rocker Son's girlfriend whom I will call Tattoo Girl for reasons that are obvious. (I adore her and will talk more about her at another time!) She was very entertaining and her chattiness seemed to draw more words and memories out of Rocker Son than we have heard in years! (Let me tell you that the heart begins to pound when you hear your grown kids utter the words, "I remember Mom telling me ......... " You just never know what will come next!)

I love my sons and I am so proud of their choices this last year. It's a wonderful thing to watch your boys turn into men. If I were The Chairman as in the movie, The Adjustment Bureau , I would set it up so that Writer Son found a more serious and better paying job, and Rocker Son would have married Tattoo Girl before moving in with her, but I trust that they will figure the big stuff out as they grow and mature. I trust the men that they are and the amazing men they are becoming.

Time to close down my Mac, the TV and Hub's snoring are becoming too distracting.......until next time,

Parental Blessing

Writer Son & Sassy Bride

Rocker Son & Tattoo Girl

Not A Kitchen Lady....

Today is going to be a great day, full of loved ones and food! My parents are here from out of state. My new daughter-in-law's parents are here from out of state also and they have never met my parents. So tonight both my sons and there lady-loves will be here along with my folks and Sassy Bride's folks! Big crowd for me.

We will get to see the wedding pics finally, maybe play some board games and eat a yummy dinner.

As some of you know, I HATE TO COOK, so why will the dinner be yummy and why am I so sure of that?

We are getting TAKE-OUT from Tahoe Joe's!! Yeehaw!

PS......And thank you thank you for voting for me at GoodBlogs, I truly appreciate it!

ME Day!

Thank you again everyone for getting me up to 200 Followers for my birthday this last Sunday! I appreciate and love to visit each and everyone of you. I have some fun pics of my 56th birthday of Feb 13th. I did what wise women have been doing for centuries; I set it up myself!

Sassy Bride (Left) and Girlfriend are so cute, I love them both so much!

When Hubs asked what I'd like to do for my special day, I told him I love going out to eat with both my sons and their ladies but we end up paying for it and they all go home once the meal is done. As we talked I got the best idea ever. I asked them all to come to our house and cook me a birthday dinner! My new DIL and Rocker Son's girlfriend both love to cook and they jumped on the plan with great enthusiasm. That made me feel good!

They worked together really well and enjoyed putting my Birthday meal together.

I am yakking away as usual. Rocker Son's Girlfriend (left) Writer Son (right).

Action shot!

I love, love, love having them all here together!

Amazing Dark Choc cake with choc cream cheese frosting.
Made from SCRATCH by Sassy Bride!

The Wings Are Getting Stronger

Hey Gang, thanks for all the help getting me up to 200 Followers by my birthday tomorrow! It's been so fun to come here and meet my new friends.

I am so excited and hopeful about tomorrow! I did what women have been doing for years in order to have a fun birthday party. I set it up myself. I asked my two clueless sons and their talented ladies to come cook me a nice dinner at our home. 

Today I got a call from Sassy Bride asking  about my favorite cake and then when I hung up and left the room I heard Hubs get a call from her. Rocker Son's girlfriend messaged me on Facebook that she is so excited to cook for me and has tons of ideas! So my plan is working! Yay!

Today Hubs wondered aloud how the day will be with two strong young women working in our kitchen together. Writer Son's Bride and Rocker Son's Girlfriend have only met once, when we all had New Year's Eve dinner together. It was fun and easy, they all seemed to hit it off wonderfully, we left the two young couples talking in the restaurant parking lot as we drove home. So even though they are both strong young ladies I have no doubt they will have fun doing our special dinner in my kitchen. 

As Hubs and I chatted about the girls he continued on the same theme. He reminded me that there is a very popular belief that many young people marry someone who is like their parent of that sex. We were walking into a food store while we had this conversation and I stopped and said, "But I am not a strong woman!". He literally laughed at me as we continued into the store. 

It is a beautiful thing to be loved by someone who sees you in a much better light than you see yourself.

2/13/11 UPDATE

Oh man, going to bed at 11pm on my birthday

with 199 Followers!

So close to 200!

Maybe the Follow fairies will visit

my blog while I sleep!!

Thanx and welcome to my new followers!

What Works For You?

Today I determined to make a change in my normal, somewhat passive style of spending time with my sons. As empty-nesters we have never wanted to be the kind of parents that make their kids feel guilty about not coming over enough. I have been out of my childhood home for about 34 years, but when I do spend time at my parents home, the first 20 minutes are always filled with complaints that I don't come often enough!

The four of us a few years ago.

I do not want to be that for my sons!

The trouble with the fear of being too demanding is that we find ourselves being too passive about our desires. Both my sons and their lady-loves live in my area. I know what it feels like to have one of them live out of state for a season and you never know when that could happen again. So, I need to grab this opportunity and enjoy having them live close by.

I know that many of you have grown kids and grandkids living far away and it is painful and sad. You want to be involved in their lives and be able to enjoy the wonderful people you have raised!

It would be silly for me to let this time get away from me. We are busy, Writer Son and Sassy Bride are busy, Rocker Son and Girlfriend are busy people. It would be very easy to remain passive about socializing with them, and that would pretty much mean it will not happen except for Birthdays or Holidays. 

So, today I made a decision to invite the boys and their girls here for pizza and a game night once a month or once a week, whatever. I don't know how often, but I do know that it needs to be a regular set time, otherwise it will not happen. 

Actually I learned this intentional-friend-time idea from Writer Son. He has always seen friendship as  a very important thing to value and be serious about. He started setting up certain days to spend with certain friends each week way back in High School! 

 I desperately do not want it to be an obligation thing, you know? So far, I know they like to be with us, just want to keep it that way!

What do you and your grown kids or you and your parents do together on a regular basis? Any ideas out there for me? Hubs and I used to eat Sunday dinner with my folks when they lived in the same town as us. Do I decide and then invite them, or should I put out the suggestion and we all figure it out together?

From Son To Husband

Was I eating something? Was I cleaning my teeth???

I mean really? I'm not mad at her, what is wrong with me??

I guess that some of us are just not meant to be photogenic. I can browse through my friend's Facebook photo albums and sure enough if I'm there, it looks like I am sleeping, or eating or wish I was somewhere else. And if I KNOW my pic is being taken, it looks even worse.

As you look at the photos above you may be able to understand why I am not really begging my son and his new wife to hurry up with the OFFICIAL wedding pics. I want very much to see their loveliness but I am dreading what will be put online with my name under it.

♥ ★ ♥

In other news, Hubs and I had our first dinner at my son and daughter-in-law's little newlywed apartment last night! As Hubs hung up the phone, we just grinned at each other and I said, "I can't believe our son just invited us to dinner at his home!". Even as we drove there it felt surreal and sweet.

We walked in to a crazy mess of a place because the moving company had delivered all their belongings from Texas the previous evening. They have been here since January 1st, just camping out in an empty apartment! So Writer Son and Sassy Bride were thrilled to finally have their wedding gifts and furniture around them. 

But they had been busy and most things were put away as they proudly opened cupboards and closets to show us. I helped Writer Son clear the dining room table off and set it for our first dinner in their own home. Sassy Bride was spinning around the tiny kitchen whipping up a delicious meal. 

It was so cute to hear them work together.

"Hey we can use the bamboo place mats!"

"Where is the box of silverware?"

"No, here let me chop the onions."

W.S. kept opening boxes and telling me how much he loved the bowls or the dish towels inside. He held up a dish scrub brush that looked like a colorful daisy and commented on how great it was! This is a whole different side of my first born that I have never experienced before!

As we ate the yummy meal he said he never knew that getting practical house stuff could be so fun. Hubs shook his head and said, "Wow, you really took a sharp turn from buying comic books to buying a couch huh?" Ha! I pretty much just sat there and smiled a lot.

I did not really know how to help or to sit and be served. When I began to take my dirty dish to the sink, they both jumped  up and said, "No, it's our turn, you guys sit and be company ok?" So cute.

Writer Son and Sassy Bride really do compliment one another. Where one is weak the other is strong and they seem to be very aware of their differences and how they complete each other. I loved watching them together in that little cozy place. 

Hubs and I drove home in silence as we wondered about this new place we are in with our kids. It's a strange and unknown land and hopefully we will figure out how to be what they need without being more than they need.

And You Thought Halloween Was Over?!

Did this sweet photo catch your eye in the Blog Reader?

Apparently costume or theme parties

are popular all year round now.

This is Rocker Son & Girlfriend.

I saw this on Facebook and I left RS a cute comment under it......

"Dexter party or spaghetti party?"

He answered......

"Zombie party mom."

I could see the eye-roll between the lines.

And This Little Chair Is Juuust Right!

Today I get home from work and immediately see signs that someone has been in our home while we were gone all day.

• The TV cabinet is wide open.
• There is an open newspaper on our kitchen table.
• There are crumbs on the kitchen counter.
• My tablet has been fiddled with.
• The bathroom toilet seat is up.

Have we been burgled? Has some random stranger broken in and enjoyed a snack while watching TV and reading the news?

Nope.

Our empty nest, described so gaily a while ago has had a visitor. 

Writer Son, so cheerfully anticipated and welcomed has spent part of his morning doing their newlywed laundry at the nice comfy home he grew up in rather than the gross apartment laundromat. 

Hmmm.

How do I feel about this? It did make Hubs and me smile and chuckle at each other knowingly when we realized who the intruder had been. Hubs called Writer Son, saying " Someone's been sitting in my chair. Someone's been eating my food!" Hubs tried to sound all gruff and angry but ended up laughing and telling Son that he is welcome to do laundry here anytime. 

And yes, he is welcome.....but....I'm not crazy about the messes he left. I know, they are small and I could sound petty, but if you go back and read my list of the perks of being an empty nester you will see that I really like coming home to a house as clean as I left it. Would he leave those crumbs in someone else's kitchen? (Maybe, because it does seem that men have an eyesight disfunction on these kinds of things.)

Hmmm, still pondering this weird season. Parenting an adult is a road that is full of twists and turns, delights and frustrations. My kids and their loves are adults. Hubs and I are still parents to them. Interesting new place we find ourselves.

We are watching the newlyweds gets stressed about finding the right furniture and fridge. The need for perfection is difficult to watch. They look at us like we are speaking Hebrew when we laughingly tell them about our apple crate side tables and curtained doors. Sassy Bride actually said, "I can't figure out why everyone smiles as they tell about how poor they were when they first got married!" haha! Oh dear!

This is gonna be interesting.

Writer Son in either Fiji or the Philippines a few years ago. Funny guy!