Saturday, February 14, 2009

Still My Valentine

This little strip of photos was taken in one of those photo booth things before we were married. On the 18th of this month we will celebrate our 31st wedding Anniversary! I can hardly believe it has been that long. The story of our getting together involved many episodes of our being interested in one another but not at the same time! We met in high school but did not get married until 6 years later. We often joke about how old our kids would be by now if we had managed to have the same feelings at the same time back then!

My hubs is the light of my life. He makes me laugh more than anyone else I know. His ability to see the best in me always humbles & surprises me. We spend all day, every day together & though it can get annoying to be together so much, I love the work we do & would not trade it for anything else. Even now as I sit here tapping away, he is sitting in a nearby chair playing a game on his laptop. He just looked up at me & said "There's my girl smiling; must be blogging again." :)

Valentines Day gets kind of lost in our house due to my birthday & our anniversary. I certainly can't complain while getting all pampered for those two important celebrations now can I? But it would be nice if they were separated a bit more so I could get my Love Language need fulfilled for V Day too! Ha! Yep, greedy I am, & now I won't even feel guilty about it Ha!

Oh yah, this was supposed to be about HIM! Oops. The mood just shifted here as he looked up & asked if I deleted any pay pal stuff off our joint email account. Yes, I did & I am a bad girl now instead of a smiling girl. Married life is interesting isn't it? But that is also the beauty of it, the moods have nothing to do with the commitment or the love. We are "we" & the small or large bumps don't change our "we-ness". (Stop giggling at that right now! :)

We have both changed in huge ways over these 30 years. He tells the young people we spend our days with that he is not married to the same person he married back then. Our changes have not always been easy to navigate. When I make a small transformation it forces him to re-examine his reactions to the change. My expectations of him change & he may not have any warning of the change! Some day I will try to write in more detail about this process for us. If the one you married many years ago becomes the person she was meant to be before life's garbage messed her up, you have to run to catch up & figure out all over again how to live together.

My Valentine has figured it out beautifully. Even though he is sitting over there right now muttering about trying to retrieve the email trash. Ah, he found it, all is well in email land & in our living room! :) Our life together is full of laughter, long talks, motorcycle rides, TV nights, dinners out (cause I don't cook!), teaching, worshiping, housecleaning (me), yard work (him), worrying about our boys, driving to our relatives, eating with friends a lot, laptopping, arguing, joking, teasing, traveling around the world with our students, and mostly being "WE".


  1. the blessings of a great partnership.
    like me, you appear to be blessed with 'a nice guy' and like mine, your guy has changed over the eyars too.

    HOM always tells me Im not the girl he married and he is so right, how could i be?

    The one really true thing about being in a good marriage is that it makes you realise how intolerable a bad one would be.

    Thanks for your lovely post brenda- you are starting to become a habit with me.

    Lisa xx

  2. This is one of the nicest posts I've ever read! I love the photos! You two are adorable together.

    Love this: "If the one you married many years ago becomes the person she was meant to be before life's garbage messed her up, you have to run to catch up & figure out all over again how to live together."

    SO TRUE!!

  3. Wonderful post...AND YOU HAVE AGED VERY still look so like you did in the photo strip. WOW.

  4. Happy Valentine's Day! Those are such cute pics too btw. :)

  5. I just loved those photos! I would love to see a coffee table book someday with photos from these booth in them ... something always just brings out the best and goofiest side of people!

    What a lovely ode to your Valentine! It is no small thing to be married as long as you have ... and I can see why you have made it work. Here's to 31 more years of bliss and we-ness!

  6. 31 years is an amazing accomplishment. It sounds like you two have it figured out! I hope I can have that many happy years with my own valentine!

  7. Brenda,
    What a beautiful way to honor what you hold so dear. Well written and I am so honored to know you.

    You give me hope and I will keep in mind the words you spoke today in your blog.

    I actually cried when I got to the end of your blog. I love that you and the hubby are a "WE". One day the hubs and I will be so, I hope!

    Anyway, keep up the good work, and Happy Anniversary!!

  8. All I can say is "thank you". This is exactly what I needed to hear today!


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